Etiquette

Discipline

We aim to develop in our children a sense of self-discipline and an acceptance of responsibility for their own actions.  We use encouragement and praise.  A kind but firm manner sets the tone of the school and in our opinion supports best practice in terms of teaching and learning.  We believe that true discipline comes from a partnership between school and the home; a partnership we that we value highly.

Our home-school agreement reflects this partnership; we ask that parents/carers sign a copy of the agreement during their child’s first term in school.

A copy of the Behaviour Policy for our school is available from the School Office.

 

Building Self Esteem

A major part of our behaviour policy is the importance given to building a child’s self esteem.  Self-esteem is the picture each person has of himself or herself.  This personal self-image influences how children see themselves, how children learn, their attitude towards each other and their work.

Self-esteem is not so much what a child thinks but much more about what they feel inside.  These feelings can produce success or failure, in relationships as well as in their learning.  A child’s feeling of self-esteem is beautifully explained in this poem:-

Children   If children live with criticism, they learn to condemn. If children live with hostility, they learn to fight. If children live with ridicule, they learn to be shy. If children live with shame, they learn to feel guilty. If children live with tolerance, they learn to be patient. If children live with encouragement, they learn to be Confident. If children live with praise, they learn justice. If children live with security, they learn to have faith. If children live with approval, they learn to like themselves. If children live with acceptance and friendship They learn to find love in the world.

Incentives and Rewards

We use a range of incentives and rewards to promote good behaviour.  Each class writes and agrees their own Class Rules annually.  These rules are clearly displayed in the classroom and used as references for the children.

These rules can basically be summed up as “we care for each other and we care for our School”.

The School Council agreed rules for the whole school and these are displayed around school.

Every class has a class council/ circle time each week.  Here a child/teacher can discuss an area of concern and seek out solutions.  We promote co-operative games and activities to help the children to work together and co-operate with each other.

In addition we also have a range of support incentives

-            lots of praise

-            stickers and merit awards

-            responsibilities and tasks

-            celebration assembly

 

Sanctions

There will always be minor infringements to deal with.  We aim to give a consistent approach to these from all members of staff.  We believe it is important to listen to each child and to label the act or behaviour that we do not like rather than the child.

In the majority of cases, listening to the children and talking about the problem, giving reasons for the misbehaviour and possible solutions is usually enough for mot minor infringements.

Sometimes we may ask a child to walk around with us for five minutes or to sit and reflect for a few minutes.

If misbehaviour is repeated after on of the above sanctions then the child will meet with the Deputy Head or Head of Key Stage 1.  If the behaviour continues the child will be referred to the Head and parents will be informed if there is no improvement.

There is no place for violence, bullying, harassment (racial or sexual), vandalism, rudeness or bad language in this school.  Parents will be informed if misbehaviour of this type is repeated or behaviour becomes a concern for any reason.

Sanctions exist to protect individuals from these negative forms of behaviour.  We will always try to offer opportunities to support and guide the ‘wrong doer’ and promote a more positive role within School.  We believe the most powerful sanction is the disapproval of their peers (friends or other children).

 

Bullying

The School takes a very serious view on bullying.  This may be verbal or physical.  School should be a safe place for all children, whatever their age.  Persistent name-calling is not allowed.  Children are expected to treat each other kindly and to show respect for each other at all times.  If a child feels that he or she is being bullied, they should talk to the class teacher, who will then try and resolve the situation.  The child who may have been involved in the bullying needs to be given the chance to express his or her views, and then to recognise what he or she has done wrong.  At the discretion of the class teacher, appropriate action may be taken and the parents and the Head Teacher will be informed.

We will provide opportunities in the playground, via Circle Time and requests for individual pupil meetings with the class teacher or Head Teacher, for children to express their concerns and find solutions.

We consider verbal abuse to be a very serious and painful issue and devote a great deal of time and effort to following through any incidents of this type.  We feel that the poem ‘Truth’ by Barry Wade expresses our view perfectly:-

Truth   Sticks and stones may break my bones But words can also hurt me. Stones and Sticks break only skin, While words are ghosts that haunt me.   Slant and curved the swords fall To pierce the stick inside me. Bats and bricks may ache through bones, But words can mortify me.   Pain from words has left its scar On the mind and heart that’s tender. Cuts and bruises have now healed, It’s words that I remember.   By Barry Wade

We also have a School Council with representatives from every year group.  We use the School Council to problem solve difficulties in school, to seek views on new initiatives, to hear ideas to enhance life at The Grove.

This year we are introducing activity packs into the playground to promote children playing together.  This will be directed particularly at children who find this aspect of play more difficult.  Our Year 5 children are trained as games leaders and undertake activities at lunch times.

Our Year 6 pupils are encouraged to look after the younger pupils and promote co-operative play.

We also take very seriously the five National Outcomes for children and the role of P.S.H.E. (Personal, Social Health, Education) and Citizenship and the rights of the child.  We always give the very highest priority to these five elements in the curriculum we deliver and the way in which we work.

 

Five Outcomes

1. Being Healthy

-        enjoying good physical and mental health and living a healthy lifestyle.

2.       Staying Safe

-        being protected from harm and neglect and growing up able to look after themselves.

3.       Enjoying and Achieving

          -        getting the most out of life and developing skills for adulthood.

4.       Making a Positive Contribution

-        being involved with the community socially and not engaging in anti-social or offending behaviour.

5.       Economic Wellbeing

-        not being prevented by social or economic disadvantage from achieving their full potential.

 

We regard the education of children’s Social, Emotional and Behavioural skills to be of equal importance to their academic skills.

Unless these aspects are in place children cannot fully access the learning opportunities presented.

 

Social, Emotional and Behavioural Skills

Self-awareness

• We are aware that feelings, thoughts and behaviours refer to different things.
• We are aware that our feelings vary in intensity.
• We know that all feelings are acceptable but that not all behaviours are acceptable.
• We recognise that context affects the acceptability of different behaviours.
• We recognise we can have conflicting feelings.
• We are aware that our feelings affect our behaviours.
• We can label and talk about feelings, using shared understandings.
• We can recognize a feeling in ourselves from external and internal clues.

 

Empathy

• We understand that all people can feel the same range of emotions.
• We know that different people will feel different emotions in the same situation.
• We use positive self-talk/visioning (rehearsing events in the mind). 
• We are aware of strategies to solve social and other problems which immediately affect us.
• We understand that our actions affect other people – we can make them feel better or worse.
• We can use “cues” to guess other people’s emotions and to image how we would feel if we were them.
• We can take on another person’s point of view.
• We can distinguish between accidental and deliberate actions.
• We are able to recognise situations in which we may need to hide our feelings to avoid upsetting others (and those where we should not).
• We are able to support other people, e.g. by making them feel happy and by using “good listening” when they share their feelings – demonstrating the skill of “active listening”.

 

Managing Feelings

• We understand the difference between “impulsive” and “thinking” behaviour.
• We are able to wait for what we want (delaying gratification).
• We know our thoughts can alter our feelings and behaviour.
• We know how to calm down/relax.
• We can talk about/share our feelings.

 

Self-motivation

• We know what short and long term goals are.
• We are able to break goals down into smaller steps.
• We know our own strengths and what leads to good outcomes for us
• We recognise what is helpful/unhelpful to us in achieving our goals.
• We practice sustained effort and learning.
• We have the ability to anticipate obstacles and plan for them.
• We are prepared to take responsibility where appropriate.
• We are able to recognise excuses and the ways we sometimes try to absolve ourselves of responsibility.
• We are confident enough to take appropriate risks.
• We are flexible in switching goals when necessary

• We are able to tolerate frustrations, e.g. by

  • Keeping the big picture in mind
  • Believing that we can get there
  • Using positive self-talk and visualisation

• We have a range of strategies for “bouncing back” from mistakes and setbacks.
• We are able to enjoy and celebrate our achievements.

 

Social Skills

• We take turns and share.
• We understand and use non-verbal communications effectively.
• We are able to make our communication appropriate to the context.
• We are able to talk about feelings effectively
• We respond appropriately to others’ emotions.
• We know how to be a good listener, using the skills of active listening.
• We use “I feel statements” instead of blame.
• We use assertive language/assertiveness skills.
• We use skills of negotiation with others.
• We know how to compete fairly.
• We can deal respectfully with confrontation and have conflict-management skills.
• We know how to apologise and make amends (making up with people).
• We know how to be sensitive when giving feedback to others.